Because I Can (A McRoll in the REAL World Story)
by ilna
Summary: A photograph sparks memories for Steve.


**Notes:** Thank you to Mari and Sammy for the daily encouragement, entertainment, and, above all, friendship.

Thank you to our readers and reviewers whose support is so exceptional.

….

_Because I Can (A McRoll in the REAL World Story)_

**November 11th – Veterans Day **

Steve was in the kitchen when Catherine and Cammie entered, fresh from a morning run on the beach. Cammie headed to her water bowl for a drink.

"Hey, good run?" Steve asked as he opened the refrigerator. He handed Catherine a bottle of water.

"Thanks." She took a drink before answering his question. "Absolutely. One of these days I'm not gonna be able to keep up with her." She bent to rub Cammie's back. "Isn't that right?"

Steve smiled at her affection for their dog. Catherine straightened, and he followed her into the living room.

"Just let me hop in the shower and we can get going," she said.

"Okay." He nodded toward the coffee table. "I got the rest of those books into the box for the library. They're closed today but we can drop it off tomorrow."

"Great," she said as she headed for the stairs. "You checked inside them, right? Made sure there weren't any papers or anything?" she asked, glancing back toward him.

He paused. "Yup."

She tilted her head with a knowing smile.

"I will do that while you're in the shower," he said, returning her smile.

She chuckled and said, "Won't be long. Ceremony's in forty minutes."

He nodded in response. She walked upstairs and disappeared into their bedroom.

Steve moved to the couch, adjusting his tie as he sat. He pulled the cardboard box of books to the edge of the coffee table and picked up a paperback. Flipping quickly through the pages he found nothing and set it down on the table. He did the same with a second and third book. As he leafed through another a cropped photograph fell to the ground. Setting the book down, he picked up the photo and turned it over.

It was a picture of him and Freddie in their room at Bancroft Hall in 1996. Freddie had Steve in a headlock though both men were laughing.

Steve sat back in the couch, a nostalgic smile on his face as he looked at the picture.

Now that Carrie and John were on the island, he found himself thinking more and more about his years at the Naval Academy. The memory Catherine and Carrie had shared a few days ago at lunch had him remembering that same summer night in his own room where a similar conversation had taken place. Staring at this picture brought that memory to mind once again.

_Steve was doing push-ups when Freddie opened the door to their room and stepped inside._

_Steve glanced over at the clock and then continued with his set._

"_Just made it," he huffed._

"_Fifteen minutes to spare," Freddie countered._

_ As Steve finished his last few push-ups, Freddie stripped down to his boxers and climbed up into his bunk. He stretched out on his back and laced his fingers behind his head._

_ After a moment he asked, "So, who is she?"_

"_What do you mean 'who is she?' " Steve asked as he stood. He grabbed a hand towel from the back of his desk chair and wiped his face. "I introduced you. Her name's Catherine Rollins."_

"_Not her name. Who is she and why did you dump me, Kelly, and Liz to have dinner with her?" He turned his head to look at Steve. "I mean, don't get me wrong, she's gorgeous. But . . . you're not thinking about . . ."_

"_No, of course not."_

"_Cuz you know you can't risk-"_

"_I'm not gonna risk it," Steve insisted._

"_Then why–"_

"_The only thing worse than being a third wheel with you and Kelly . . . is you trying to set me up with someone she knows."_

_Freddie, still on his back, threw his hands into the air. "Oh, one time I–"_

_Steve was incredulous. "One time?" He flung the towel at his roommate's head and started ticking off examples on his fingers. "First it was Kelly's best friend. Then it was her other best friend. Then it was her sorority sister. Now it's her cousin." He shrugged and turned toward his closet. "I'm not interested, man."_

"_Yeah, you're never interested," Freddie said as he sat up. "Apparently that's changed."_

_Steve turned as Freddie threw the towel back at him, catching it in one hand._

"_No, it–"_

"_I know what I saw," Freddie said. "I was beginning to think I'd never see it on you." _

"_I told you, man, I'm not gonna risk it," Steve said, putting the towel in his laundry bag. "Even if . . ."_

_Freddie straightened. "If?"_

"_Never mind," Steve said. He pulled his t-shirt off and added it to the bag. "Forget it."_

"_Dream on. I'm not gonna forget it. What? 'Even if' what?"_

_Steve kept his back to Freddie, brushing a hand over his bed as if to smooth the non-existent wrinkles. "She's . . . different. Special," he said quietly. _

_Freddie's voice showed his surprise at the admission. "Dude. You just met her."_

_Steve inhaled and straightened. "Yeah, well. Whatever. It doesn't matter. Nothing's gonna happen. It's her first year," he said as he climbed onto his bunk._

_Freddie paused. "You know you won't always have that excuse."_

_Steve looked over at him for a moment before lying back, one arm tucked behind his head and his gaze focused on the ceiling._

….

_ Two and a half years later, Steve was preparing to leave their room to meet Catherine. He was stopped at the door by his roommate's voice._

"_I don't know how you do it, man," Freddie said from his desk where he was finishing up an assignment._

"_What?" Steve asked, looking back at him._

"_Hang out with Rollins all the time and not . . ."_

"_What?"_

_Freddie glanced over at him and said pointedly, "_Hang out _with Rollins."_

_Steve sighed. "Come on, man . . ."_

_Freddie turned in his chair to face him fully. "I doubt it's escaped your notice she hasn't dated anyone else the last three years."_

_Steve folded his arms. _

"_And neither have you," Freddie added._

_Steve rolled his eyes slightly. "Not that you haven't tried to set me up with–"_

"_I'm just trying to get you in gear, one way or the other. And the fact that you haven't spared a second glance for anyone besides Ca–"_

_Steve cut him off with a hand in the air. "It's just . . . it's not the right time."_

"_Then when is the right time?" Freddie pressed. "Graduation is in the spring, man."_

"_It's more complicated than that. I just . . . I can't. Not right now."_

_Freddie paused and then stood, taking a couple steps toward Steve. _

"_Look, man, I know you've got . . ." he paused, searching for the words. "I mean, with what happened to your mom and what your dad did and everything . . ."_

_Steve shifted his weight, looking away. _

_Freddie sighed. "I know it must be hard to . . ."_

_Steve shifted again. He forced out an uncomfortable laugh. _

"_Man, what is this?" he asked._

"_What?"_

_"What's the matter with you?_ _You feeling okay?"_

_Freddie chuckled awkwardly. "Come on, I'm trying to be serious here."_

"_Yeah, that's got me worried."_

_Freddie took a deep breath. "Look, in five months we could be sent anywhere in the world. And in another year so could she. I just thought . . . I mean, you know Kelly and I fight all the time, but . . . I know she loves me. And that . . . knowing that . . . at the end of the day," he gave a small shrug, "that's everything."_

_Steve paused, looking at his roommate. _

_Finally, he motioned to the door and said, "I'm gonna be late. I've gotta_–_"_

"_Yeah, I know. Get going. Just . . . think about it, will ya?" Freddie said with a shrug, heading back to his desk._

_Steve paused again with his hand on the doorknob and looked back at Freddie for a moment before turning to leave._

The sound of Catherine coming down the stairs brought Steve back to the present.

"Ready to go?" she asked as she adjusted her watch and smoothed down the skirt of her simple navy blue dress. "With traffic it might take fifteen minutes to get to the Punchbowl."

"Yeah," Steve said, standing.

"What's that?" she stepped up beside him and pointed at the picture in his hand.

He gave her a small smile and showed her the picture.

She took it and chuckled as she looked. "Wow." She put a hand on his arm and smiled at him. "That's a great picture," she said sincerely.

The corner of his mouth quirked up. "I was about to get the upper hand."

Catherine smiled indulgently and handed him back the picture. She straightened his tie.

"I'm sure you were."

Her eyes followed his movements as he slipped the small photo into the pocket of his button-down shirt.

Smiling, she leaned up and kissed his cheek.

"Let's go," she said and turned toward the door.

He grabbed her hand, and when she turned back with a questioning look, he bent and kissed her. She raised a hand to his face, returning the kiss.

When they parted, she smiled and asked, "What was that for?"

He gave her a slight shake of his head and a soft smile.

"Because I can now."

She waited as if sensing he had more to say.

"I love you," he said. "And I know that you love me." Swallowing, he touched the pocket of his shirt. "Freddie once told me . . . 'at the end of the day, that's everything.' Because of you, I know what he meant."

She put her hand over his on his pocket and leaned up to kiss him once more.

"We were very lucky we knew him," she said quietly.

With a nod, he slid an arm around her shoulder and they headed out the door to attend the Veterans Day Ceremony at the National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific.

….

_Veterans Day is on a Tuesday this year so it wasn't a regular REAL World posting day. But that's a reminder for me at least that we shouldn't wait until Veterans Day to show our appreciation to the men and women who have served and who continue to serve our country and to their families._


End file.
